5.17.2003
 
Tonight was... wow.

Well, I haven't done that in the longest time. Especially in the car...

But I had to stop before it got really serious; beyond heavy petting.

Greek boy Halley is so sweet. We found a slate of dry ice, and he put it into his pants so he wouldn't jump me.

Which is insane because I don't think I'm cute. Or hot. Or anything besides a facade. But he thought so, and that was amazing.

Still... it had to stop. He still had a boyfriend who he loves very much. It's just that his libido frequently takes over.

And I won't be the home-wrecker this time.

Tonight was amazing.

We started from hugging underneath the stars at the park, and he was desperate for human contact. So was I. Then it started with simple caresses and him caressing my neck with his warm breath. I trailed his own throat with my lips.

Then, pulling back, foreheads resting on eachother, I asked him if he was about to do something that he'll regret.

He shook his head.

I asked him if this was what he wanted.

He nodded.

And that's when our lips met.

When I got home, I thanked my dad for letting me go out tonight (even though I fabricated what I did a bit) and he said one of the best things he could ever say to me:

"I trust you. You're practically an adult anyways, and I know that I raised you not to do anything stupid."

. . . . .

Is it so wrong that we met because we were both lonely?

Or is it wrong that I fell for my own urges, possibly at the expense of his relationship with his boyfriend.

This is all so damned confusing.

Desire is fucking me over, and Fate is filming the entire scene.

. . . . . posted:||1:05 AM . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

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