When I made a resolution to become more sociable, I did so by being an empath. Learned from good friend Karen how to listen better to what people say and do, and finding common ground with them (or at least know when to stay out of their way if they'rein a bad mood) by reading their emotions.
It's like method acting, in a way.
There's only one problem: my own emotions become extremely influenced by everything around me. If I watch something idiotic and enjoyable, I act extremely carefree and rather goofish. If IFC or Sundance has been playing, I feel compelled to be avante garde. If I see an art show, I'm inspired to persue greatness with my own abilities.
The worst case is my use of music to heighten my emotions. When I feel down, I put on some appropriately mellow and sad music to ride out the need to be lonely. When angered, I pull out some rock and maybe nu-metal to get my blood pumping red. And why do I do this? For me, it's better that I run each extreme emotion through its course until the fire has burnt itself out.
But then, can you answer me this: which emotions are those of my environment, and which are my own? I can't decipher which emotions are real, which are synthesized, and which are delusional.
If you can't tell, I've been reading The Perks of Being a Wallflower again. While listening to Death Cab for Cutie. Talk about a double whammy...
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